Mark Twain wrote, “Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.” As the midterm elections approach, I offer other smears that have been directed at Congress: What’s the difference between a centaur and a senator? One is half man and half horse’s ass—and the other is a creature in mythology. What’s the difference between death and taxes? Congress keeps making taxes worse. If pro and con are opposites, is congress the opposite of progress? Why are all the circuses closed? Because all the clowns are in congress. What should we do about people who receive government handouts but refuse to work? Kick them out of congress. A priest, a minister, and a